The following steps include a sample plan for increasing your safety and preparing in advance for the possibility of further violence. Although, as a victim, you do not have control over your partner’s violence, you do have a choice about how to respond to them and how to get yourself to safety.
Safety During An Argument
- If you’re on a date and you feel unsafe, how could you call to get a safe ride home? What would you do if left in an isolated area?
- If you’re at school and you feel unsafe, who could help you? Where could you be safe? What teacher or counselor do you trust?
- If you are having an argument, try to ensure you are in a room with access to a door. Try and avoid the bathroom, garage, kitchen, or anywhere near weapons.
- Choose a code word or phrase and share it with trusted family and friends. Be sure they know this word to know when they should call for help.
Safety In My Home
- If your partner comes over and you’re alone and feeling unsafe, who can you call to come over? Who can you call if you need help?
- Note the location of exits in your house and locations of nearby phones in case you need to call the police.
- If your partner harasses you on the phone:
- Think about screening your calls with voicemail or an answering machine.
- Have your phone number changed.
- Ask your telephone company or wireless carrier to trace the call for a stalking report.
- If your partner/former partner is outside your home:
- Do not engage with them.
- Call a friend or family member, or the police.
- Take photos only if you are able to without being seen.
- Document how many times it happens to file a stalking report.